Simply ME...

A star or a rainy cloud,,, realistic or a dreamer,,, tough or emotional,,, a butterfly or a dolphin,,, it is all about me reflecting the transparent me!

Saturday, April 14, 2007

S H A L L OWness

Does time really matter?

Some people think that knowing a person for a long time and by long I mean 5+ years would make the 'Will you marry me?!' RIGHT and WISE!

But who are you to decide if it's right or wrong or just in time, and what does the '5+ years' mean?! You can spend half of your life with someone hiding behind a mask (and this can happen easily,, there are many lousy -low losers out there) only to know when it's just too late that you've been deceived.. yet you can spend so little time with someone to feel as if you already know him for ages .. when two pure souls meet... there's a strange force that makes them belong to each other. A power that makes all the time in the world means so little to what is deeply and sincerely felt.

Time factor in relationships is so irrelevant!!

What's the measurement.. 2 years? 3 years? 5 years? You can spend 10 years knowing someone and spend so little time with him.. so for those out there this should also count.. NO?!

Knowing someone would in no way be comapred to living with someone, and since the two are not the same, the time spent in knowing that one without living with him should not make any difference. Cause in both cases it would be the same,,, long, short, shouldn't really matter. Still living with him would be different.

Years ago, I used to say 'I can never chose to spend my whole life with someone without knowing him for a minimum of 5 years'.. or I believed so! And with time I realised that relationships cannot be judged by how much time ,,, or how long,,, or how many years. There's much more than that.

To talk about relationships and measure their strength depending on that mainly, is what I call pure shallowness.

9 Comments:

  • At April 14, 2007 , Blogger Sam said...

    you can know a person all your life, but untill you living under one roof u will never really know him. i've had freinds who have known each other for many many years and once married or just living togther they realize that they didnt know each other at all..usually people put on their best faces for the few hours they are together...i once got engaged to a guy i knew for years and dated for two...and once i really got to spent time with him it took less than a year to realize that no way he is the one i want to live with and we broke it off...with hubby i met him and went out with him for 2months before we got engaged...we were married 10months after meeting..and from our first few days i felt like i have known him all my life...as annoying as he can get sometimes...i could not have asked and for a better husband..so really it does not matter how long u know a person...and notice how in the west divorces is so wide spread even though most of them have dated and even lived together for years before getting married..

     
  • At April 14, 2007 , Blogger and life goes on... said...

    Sam.. THANK YOU! this is exactly what I meant.. time means nothing when it comes to relationships! Living together is what really counts.. there's nothing that annyoys me more than this question 'how long have you known him'!? :)

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger O said...

    Well-said Dima...

    Best ways to know a person:
    - Work with them
    - Travel with them
    - Live with them

    I remember reading how some companies have team building activities by arranging hiking trips, as they claim it is an excellent way for managers to know the strengths and weaknesses of their employees...

    But on the other hand, knowing someone for let's say a week or two is NOT enough, but I know that this is not the case here as we are talking about the general assumption that the longer you have been knowing a person, the more you are supposed to know how that person really is. Maybe in a perfect world, but in the defunct world we live in, you can 'know' a person for God knows how long, yet learn new things about them that you never noticed/they never showed before

    *sigh*

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger and life goes on... said...

    O .. yeah they always say travelling with someone helps in knowing him more, I think the travelling, working and living under one roof are the times when you show it all.. the good and bad! The times where you'd go mad, sad, down, crazy and just be yourself dropping down all the masks, not because you want to but because you have to. It's very true what you said, you keep learning new things about the person you're with and he'll learn new things about you too.. there's always something new to learn .. ALWAYS :)

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger PŕōuđPāŀĩ said...

    sam: so nicely said, and its heart warming what u said bout ur better half.. i had known my better half for 7 years, we were friends at first (or at least i dealt with him as a friend at first - he loved me instantly) he never gave up on the feelings he had for me, and i eventually started my own set of feelings.. time is indeed not a factor Dima, lawla il zuroof kan ana w A min shi 6 sneen mjawazeen.. it dint take us long to know we were created for each other.. bas i guess kul shi bwa2to 7elo :)

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger and life goes on... said...

    PŕōuđPāŀĩ.. akeed kul shy b wa'to 7ilo :D wish you all the best and for your dream to come true inshalla.. :)

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger PŕōuđPāŀĩ said...

    Dima: allah yesma3 mennek :) cant wait to start the rest of my life with him.. all the best to u too bannout *hug*

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger and life goes on... said...

    PŕōuđPāŀĩ... ohhhh how sweet! :$ inshalla :)

     
  • At April 15, 2007 , Blogger Oriental Arabesque said...

    sam & o said it all…I totally agree with them.

    Dima your post reminded me of my friend Rima who got married last year to the guy she loved and knew for 4 years (excluding the engagement period)
    After the wedding I asked how did she find marriage life and how are thing going between her and Hadi? She said: to my surprise Mais, I’m still knowing new thing about him after living under the same roof, I thought I knew everything about him, I know him inside out and there’s nothing more left, but the truth is I’m still getting surprised with new things on daily basis.

    Same thing happend with me and my closest and best friends, I knew more things about them and about their daily habits when we traveled together and when we stayed at each other homes for few days!

     

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