Simply ME...

A star or a rainy cloud,,, realistic or a dreamer,,, tough or emotional,,, a butterfly or a dolphin,,, it is all about me reflecting the transparent me!

Thursday, January 31, 2008

USB as a gift?!

I was looking for a nice USB oil fragrance burner, and ended up with so many cool USB stuff.. all of which I would consider unique gifts, since nowadays everyone spends most of his time in front of a computer screen.

I would really want to know if anyone has this or anything similar? Does it really work and give a nice smell, or it's no good?!

There is also this classical fan, which I don't mind having right in front of me in this extremely annoying hot weather

I would love to have one of those. It's the disco mouse! Though I think it works best at night. And might be a little bit disturbing, and not an everyday use kind of thing.. but still, for a plain desk, it would make a world of difference.

The USB heated gloves would definitely help if Im still in Amman. Buying them would be a must. I believe they're very useful especially that there are some freezing offices, either because it's winter or because of the air condition.

I have a thing with typing at night, I would put all the lights and still feel in need for something closer that's directly connected and close to the screen, I haven't really tried them, I wonder if they really make a difference or just another colorful accessory.

Ok. this is not a USB. But I would LOVE to have one of those. I keep imagining how cool they would look on my desk! It's called the 'Glow-in-the-dark light bulb', so it basically charges during the day and glow for up to 8 hours in the darkness. And it's recharged once exposed to the daylight again.

-------------------------- Update --------------------------

Keeping your drink cold is no longer a problem, and you can spend as much time as you want without worrying about your cold drinks anymore.. I just love it!!!


just Be yourself, will you?!

A small advice, you will never get to that level.. no matter how much you try! so will you just give up and be yourself, and stop being a copy cat for a change. It's funny how some people spend their whole life tying to be someone else, when all they get is one fall after another..

Stop looking for what others have, and just enjoy being you. If it's the 'you' who you want to change, and you're not fully satisfied with who you are then you have a serious problem, cause nothing will change the reality.. Im enjoying the imitation, it gives me more pleasure to know that you still have that kind of empty life and that same poor pathetic nature. A 'wanna be' follower will get you to no where.. look for your real identity and maybe one day- who knows- you'll probably get the peace of mind you're still, and will always be looking for.

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Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Not another 'SNOW' post

As Im sitting here, and it's so humid and HOT, I envy everyone back there who is enjoying the snow. Ok, I admit it, I have never really liked when it used to snow cause I felt that it's ruining my outings and plans. But now that Im not there, I feel Im missing out on something.

Though this is not another SNOW post. Thank God! I don't really feel like seeing any snow photos. I think I have seen so many for one day.

It's about chocolate. We had this chocolate night, and decided to go to the 'just chocolate' place where they have nothing but chocolate. And instead of going there for dessert which is what everyone really does, we decided we'll have chocolate for dinner.

At first it was pretty cool, since everything looked delicious and was delicious up till I felt I can't see any chocolate for the next couple of weeks! So everything is not only filled with chocolate, but comes with a chocolate dip too, so it's double if not triple the dose. I literally felt the chocolate coming out of my nose and ears!!! I don't really believe in those places, I mean seriously no matter how much you love chocolate, you wouldn't feel like going there more than once a month if not less..

Though I really wonder how long will it take me to change my mind, and think oh God I want that chocolate brownie and white chocolate dip RIGHT NOW!


Tuesday, January 29, 2008


It seems that I have a thing for the latest fashion trends, clothes, all types of accessories. That would include make up too! I just can’t handle it, if Im walking in the street I don’t just window shop but I end up trying things on and buying what I like.
It doesn’t matter how late I am or if I am to meet up with someone, cause it’s just like this, if I see something that I like I just go and check it out.. Nothing can stop me, it’s like having this extra uncontrollable energy and I feel like letting it out.

It doesn’t only stop here, I also look at people in the street, I like to see what’s in style.. shoes, skirts, sandals, even hair bands and hats!! And I pay attention for the smallest details, accessories, sunglasses and the latest nail polish colour. Whether the color of the month is red or orange.. it all matters! And I really wonder why on earth haven’t I studied anything that has to do with fashion or design!!!

So I decided to bring it all here.. YES! Im going to blog about it. FASHION! But the fashion here, which is more or less different than anywhere else!!Im learning to enjoy it though, I see it as part of the adaptation since it’s something that MATTERS to me, so I have to live with it.. but to buy clothes here would mean you can’t wear them anywhere else. Both the colors and designs would have something to do with the beach.. it’s very simple.

I have never in my whole life seen the amount of flip flops (which are called or known as ‘thongs’ here!).. you see them everywhere! Actually in the summer you see nothing else but ‘thongs’. And the crazy thing is that they’re simple and dull. In winters, when it's raining you'd be seeing them too!
The Havaianas thongs which are seen everywhere look like this.

But you can’t but have one at least.. they’re pretty comfortable even for long distance walking. I wear them to university, to the beach, to the city.. everywhere and anywhere! Though what’s so uncool is when you get the weird tan lines when wearing them in a sunny day!

As for the clothes, and because of the really hot weather, I can understand why the wide beach dresses are sold everywhere, but they’re very simple too. And not cheap taking into consideration that they’re not to be worn in Amman anywhere except for the pool!

It took me a while to accept it, and to realize that for a party, wearing a –dull, one colour- thong would do.. or even to university a beach dress would look nice! And I found it hard at the beginning to get used to the brand names since most of them are either Australian (with a beach style) or Asian, but now Im getting to like it… and the great thing is that you can wear whatever you want, and have all the mixed colours in a single outfit without getting any weird looks!

You get to be who you are.. without caring what others think or say… and be as simple as you can cause it’s 'you' who make a difference and not what you’re wearing!

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Monday, January 28, 2008

The new 'it' accessory of the season

Moey's post 'Gadgets I Like..' and in particular the 'I Am Not A Paper Cup', reminded me of a bag that's so fashionable now.. and Im seeing it almost everywhere.

I really like it and think it's cool, maybe because it's different and stylish!

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I got it!

What would you do when a bird shits on your head?!!

Ok, I got it. No more 'beach attempts' I guess.


Sunday, January 27, 2008

Australia Day 2008

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Body Modification

Yesterday I was literally about to vomit when I saw this. And the problem is that she was standing so close and I couldn't but keep staring at her.. I can't see any point of doing this! It looks like shit and Im sure it hurts like hell when they first do it.. so why?


Saturday, January 26, 2008

What Do you Think of this?

They have them all over the games places! look cool, but are they fun?! What do you think?


watch out!!!

Watch out people!!!

Ammar is back.

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Many Thanks!

Thank you Qwaider for your 911 Emergency Call! I was not home, Nimer has taken care of it..


Friday, January 25, 2008

songs.. and more

it's amazing how songs can always bring back a certain memory, they would make you live that moment again and again no matter where you are or who you become. One song would get me back to that cheerful child, sitting with dad in his old white car, going to school every morning.. talking about everything and anything, just to make sure that my sleepy dad would be all awake when he drives back.

Another would just get me back to all the summers we used to spend in the pool all day long.. the burning sun, the strong lovely smell of coconut oil, the french fries and ketchup.. they used to play Fairouz every single morning, teery ya tiyyara teery.. i can still remember the exact words, our laughs and fights on whose jump was more impressive.

There are certain songs that would remind me of the drives we used to take.. me and my two sisters, and the times we used to go the malls.. which became more or less like a habit, even if that meant to go there only for an ice cream or a nice walk!

Others would just get me back in time, where I used to drive with friends, open the windows, and sing loudly.. get all the energy out, and just enjoy.. the louder the better..

I would remember this phase where I was waiting for something to happen, I would spend hours on the computer playing brainless games and listening to music.. I wanted to relax without having to worry about anything.. as if there is nothing in the world that matters anymore. And those songs would get me back to that state of mind, where I go numb..

But our wedding's first dance song will always be the one that brings joy and happiness to my heart.. it would get me back to that dance floor, with family and friends standing around.. looking and smiling at us.. my mom and sisters' tearful eyes.. as much as I was scared of that dance, as much as I enjoyed it. Everything turned to black, and it was just me and my hubby.. I memorized the words.. and I was there singing with all my heart.. as I hear it again, it gives me goose bumps. I remember every step, every move, every smile.. as it was only yesterday.

Songs representing pain, love, tears, loss, hatred, hope, faith, and loneliness.. songs reminding us of certain people that were part of our lives... songs that are linked to an event, to a place or a face.. they all still exist, and they still have that same effect regardless of what, where, or how!

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Thursday, January 24, 2008

How frustrating!!!

This is the third time we decide to go to the beach, prepare the beach bag, get my pink big hat which doesn't fit inside the bag, hide the money and mobile in the magical hidden pocket inside the bag, get the sunglasses, sunblock, and leave the house only to come back in less than ten minutes.

Two weeks ago, the minute we got to the beach it just started to rain!! Rain in the summer .. how ugly is that!

Today was a different case though.. it was a 'sunny' happy morning, or so it seemed, and we got so excited to make a quick decision and plan our third attempt.. the minute we got out, the weather completely changed.. it was chilly, with no sun at all, and cloudy in an extremely annoying way.

So I thought instead of going there and ruin the day while waiting for the sun to come back or the weather to get better, we should cut it short and go back home, and just change to plan B. I've been here for almost a month now, and I haven't really expected to have such a weather in the summer.. it's really frustrating to have all the beaches but not being able to go to any because of a bad weather.. and this has been the case for almost a month now! I still haven't seen any penguins or dolphins... *sigh*


why Apple.. WHY?

What I don't understand is how come there's no PINK shuffle! I mean I HATE red, purple was ok till something happened and I started to hate it.. so I was left with only three choices.. and thought the blue looks nicer than what's left.. BUT why Apple there's no pink?!!!

they will be selling the new gorgeous pink nano next month, but what about the shuffle!!!? That's so Unfair!

What's cool about it is that you can have something engraved on it.. what can be more special than this?!


Tuesday, January 22, 2008

what?!!!! again.. please?

I was in this business meeting kinda thing today, and someone who's been working for the university for YEARS now, actually no.. she's the one who's in charge of the student development part, and she asked me something that's just so weird in an oddly stupid way.. I needed to ask twice and make sure that I really got what she's asking right..

After knowing that Im from Jordan, she asked me if we have a stock market there!!!!!!!??

How stupid is that!! But the good thing is that she made a total fool of herself infront of someone who's been to Jordan twenty years ago.. that suits her well.. !


Saturday, January 19, 2008

no more running

Since the weather hasn't been great lately, and Im not doing any walking .. I decided today to use the treadmill. And because one of the two treadmills is down now, and I have no clue WHY when It was working perfectly just before I leave, it's getting harder to find the one that's working not in use. I was so excited to find no one there, and was happy that finally Im going to try and burn off some of the Pakistani food I had today.. so I skipped the walking part that I normally do before the running, and started running immediately.. as I was trying to slow down the speed a bit after realizing that this is becoming too much, surprise- surprise, the 'slow' button was not working, not even with a hit...

I wanted to really know if it's only this particular button, or it's the whole damn thing, so I tried to push the 'fast' button just to see if things are ok.. then when nothing seemed to be working on that board, I said ok Im going to do it .. I'll try the 'stop' .... but it was not working as well!

My legs were killing me from the running, and I was speeding of course with all the energy I had earlier after our heavy breakfast and lunch today.. but I COULDN'T STOP THE MACHINE! I was trying to imagine all the possible ways I can pull myself away without getting any part of my body broken.. and i finally saw it, that stopping emergency button (which is supposed to be RED but for some odd reason someone decided to ruin that little thing too and turned it to black, so you'd hardly get to see it), but I did.
And at that point I started to hope that this would finally stop it.. and thank God it did.

What i don't understand is how can they screw up both treadmills at the same time!! Im really pissed off. And I get more pissed off remembering what happened today.. and all the panic I felt just because there was no sign that says this stupid machine has some issues!


Friday, January 18, 2008


The funny thing is that ever since I came here, my parents seem to worry a thousand times more about anything and everything. The fact that my dad is a doctor, and him taking things easy.. he has seen many sick people.. and diagnosed some fatal diseases.. so for him a flue is nothing, a cold doesn't mean a thing, and a fever shouldn't keep you in bed.
But now it's all different, if I say Im having a headache.. he'd become really worried, acting as if it's the end of the world. If i tell him anything.. and the anything would include me wanting to be spoiled for fun, he'd tell me to go and see a doctor!

And now with the cooking, my parents were both suggesting that I'd call them anytime I need anything.. and considering the time difference this would be insane! After I showed how much Im against doing that, they had this brilliant idea of me cooking at night which would solve the time difference issue!
This is absolutely crazy and i wouldn't consider cooking at night for sure, but at least they come up with all the possible solutions and always seem excited about them .. anything that would make me happy.

The unconditional love parents show can't be described in words. The amount of respect and admiration I have for them grows with every passing day.. It's distance I guess that opens your eyes to all the things that were taken for granted...

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I don't mind!

I don't really mind to have something like this in our living room... in fact I'd be the first to 'Leopard' Style it... !


Thursday, January 17, 2008

The black BOX

The other day I was chatting with my sister and she was telling me that our grandpa died four years and 6 days ago.. my reaction was REALLY!? And she said how come you don’t remember the date? Not even the year?

It’s then when I realized that I try to block the memory… the saddest memories are the ones which I keep in this black box at the very end of my mind, and whenever something reminds me of anything that’s even close to what hurts, I just block it and push it further..
Im not sure whether it’s good or bad, but I know for a fact that it’s the only way to control my extremely sensitive nature.
Does this mean Im able to control my emotions? Or better to say it means that Im scared to let those emotions control me so I try to avoid them as much as I can and avoid getting in a deep depression…

It hurts not to remember those dates, the bitter moments, the painful memories .. but then again what good would happen from remembering them? If you lose someone so dear, then the memory wouldn’t get him back, nor would the broken heart.. and even when I want to remember him, I don’t think of him as sick or weak laying in the hospital’s bed for months.. I blocked that too, long time ago! All I remember now is how strong and healthy he was.. sitting in his favourite corner close to the table with his grandchildren photos’ frames…

I really hope that this black box would hold no more blocked dates or sad memories, I hope that 2008 will be a year with all the happy events that I would want to remember and treasure for years to come..

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a conceited fool

the best way to deal with arrogance, is simply to save your time on something that's of more importance and to just ignore!

The more attention you're given, the bigger fool you're making of yourself... maybe ignorance would fix your big, shallow, empty head.


Wednesday, January 16, 2008

I personally think it's..

Disgusting, this is the right word to describe it!

A friend of mine was recently in Japan, and told me about his spa experience there. Apparently they have what they call 'the magic fashionable fish spa', where small fishes would be eating the dead skin on your toes and legs. I would never imagine myself doing such a thing! He described it as ticklish, but I would say ewww..

if you're interested to know more, or want to go to Japan and experience something different, you can read more about it...

'At such a spa, many Garra Rufa, a type of small tropical fish, also nicknamed Chinchin Yu, nibble fish or simply doctor fish, are put in hot springs. As they can live and swim freely in at least 43-degree-hot waters, they are naturally used for the treatment of skin diseases in such spas.

When placed in the spa, these fish can feed themselves on the dead cells of the human body, since they only consume such cells, leaving the healthy skin of the human body to grow. The whole process is reportedly free of pain. It won't hurt and the bather might feel a pleasant tingling on his or her skin.

The fish species are often found in the river basins in the Middle East, including Syria, Iraq, Iran and Turkey, and thus is also called Turkish Fish. It is legally protected from commercial exploitation in Turkey due to concerns over harvesting for export.'


Monday, January 14, 2008

It's healthy to be BACK

Going back home the first time is a must. Being homesick can be hidden deep inside you without realizing it.. it might be something that's haunting you but you keep pushing it away, until it just hits you and you can't take it anymore, yet you don't know what exactly is going wrong..
it's when your life is split into two, when you're doing one thing here but thinking of what can be done there.. it's then when you should think that maybe you need to enjoy what you have more and stop thinking about the what 'might be'..

The good thing about being back is that it gets you to face reality and your true feelings. And when you make sure that your family is doing great.. friends are cool.. everything is just the way it is, the way it was just before you leave.. you'd miss it back there.. you'd miss being away!
When you get to spend some lonely mornings, while everyone is at work.. it's then when you realize that they're all moving with their lives but you are in this unexplainable break.. and you just need to move on.. just like everyone else!

Being home for the first time, makes you value what you had.. treasure what you experienced while being away.. It gives you all the strength that was not there, especially when you finally believe that your parents are happy when you're happy.. they are proud of you when you're achieving your dreams.. being far doesn't mean that they would love you any less, on the contrary it just means that they respect your choice in building the future.. and they would love you just as much, if not even more..

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Im starting the countdown

two more weeks for the PlayStation 3.. I can't wait.. Any feedback on cool games?!!? Please!


Sunday, January 13, 2008

Something is WRONG

Ever since I got here, and I was suffering from this deep sudden sleep.. at first I thought it's a Jet Lag, but I doubt that a jet lag can last for two weeks and more!

So I was thinking maybe it's fatigue.. but it just can't be! I mean it's so uncontrollable.. I would be watching a movie, or reading.. and then my eyes would feel so heavy, and I get to a point where I can't even open them anymore.

Not even for a second.. I get to this really deep sleep where I wake up later on not knowing where I am or what Im doing.. It's very disturbing.. the good thing though is that it's not happening everyday!!! But today was one of those days... Am I turning to a sleep addict or what?!! *sigh

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Bats or Flying Foxes

The whole time I was thinking those are Bats, it turned out they're called Flying Foxes.

'Bats of the genus Pteropus, belonging to the Megachiroptera sub-order, are the largest bats in the world. They are commonly known as the Fruit Bats or Flying Foxes among other numerous colloquial names. They live in the tropics and subtropics of Asia (including the Indian subcontinent), Australia, Oceania, islands off East Africa (but not the mainland Africa), and a number of remote oceanic islands in both the Indian and Pacific Oceans.
The oldest ancestors of the genus Pteropus to be unearthed appear in the fossil record almost exactly as they are today, the only notable differences being early flight adaptations such as a tail for stabilizing. The oldest megachiropteran is dated at around 35 million years ago, but the preceding gap in the fossil record makes their true lineage unknown.
Characteristically, all species of flying foxes only feed on nectar, blossom, pollen, and fruit, which explains their limited tropical distribution. They do not possess echolocation, a feature which helps the other sub-order of bats, the Microbats, locate and catch prey such as insects in mid-air. Instead, smell and eyesight are very well-developed in flying foxes. Feeding ranges can reach up to 40 miles. When it locates food, the flying fox "crashes" into foliage and grabs for it. It may also attempt to catch hold of a branch with its hind feet, then swing upside down — once attached and hanging, the fox draws food to its mouth with one of its hind feet or with the clawed thumbs at the top of its wings.

wikipedia At sunset you can see them covering the sky moving from one area to another.. Whether Bats or Flying Foxes, I HATE THEM BOTH.


Wednesday, January 09, 2008

the 3 questions

one of the things that will stay on my mind from my last visit to Amman is a very weird incident.

So I guess some people will never change! I saw a friend, whom I lost touch with long time ago, and it was like nothing from all the potential scenarios that I imagined happening. Far away from anything I expected. But it's only because.. again, some people - especially those who are curious- will never change.

Instead of all the normal 'Hi, How are you'.. thing, and instead of me asking about what's new, her engagement.. blah blah. And just because I don't really care, and I don't like to ask .. if someone wants to say something, then let it be, otherwise I wouldn't really ask..

I was asked three questions, and that's it.. nothing more, nothing less..

How long are you staying here?

Is your hubby with you?

When is he leaving?!

And she was gone...

that was it.. after not seeing her for almost a year, and the problems we had.. this was our conversation, or better to say 'questioning'.. !


Thursday, January 03, 2008


It is not my favorite number..

Not the number of friends I have..

It is not a number Im using for a countdown..

Not one that I need to memorize or remember.

44 is the number of mosquito bites I had on new year's eve.. !!!
I didn't feel a single thing that night.. all the traces and itchiness happened next day! How Weird is that!!!


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