stop asking me 'what's wrong?!!!', please!
The thing that I hate the most is when you feel down, stressed out, or even mad at someone or from a certain thing..
and then a person comes and keeps asking you 'what's wrong with you?!',,, 'Is there anything wrong?!',,, 'you look different today!',,, 'is everything ok?!',,, 'Is there anything you want to tell me?!!'
Even if there WAS nothing wrong.. not even the slightest thing going wrong... just hearing those words continuously makes you in an extremely bad mood, and you'd get to feel that there must be something wrong! So you start to create things, or come up with things, that would make your world look gloomier!
The other day, -I never and I mean NEVER had the black bags under my eyes'.. never knew what they meant, or how they looked.. never even bothered to buy a concealer to hide such things, and then someone told me you have black bags under your eyes! And now whenever I look in the mirror I keep checking under my eyes.. It just terribly annoys me.
So if there's nothing wrong going on, by hearing such words, many things start to look wrong or bad for you.
Recently, I've decided to be around people who reflect some positive energy and a positive attitude. Somestimes saying small words- that you think have little meaning- can make someone extremely bothered. Even if you say them to show you care, or to show your love... such things if said in a wrong time or a wrong way, they would have the very opposite meaning.
It's really important to chose the ones you want to spend your free time with,,, the ones you want to include in outings... lately, I felt that some people can make you feel down easily. No matter how good you feel, they turn to experts when it comes to ruining your mood!
Think before you say things, If each one gets to be treated in the same way he treats people.. Im sure there will be less trouble .. and definitely less headaches!
and then a person comes and keeps asking you 'what's wrong with you?!',,, 'Is there anything wrong?!',,, 'you look different today!',,, 'is everything ok?!',,, 'Is there anything you want to tell me?!!'
Even if there WAS nothing wrong.. not even the slightest thing going wrong... just hearing those words continuously makes you in an extremely bad mood, and you'd get to feel that there must be something wrong! So you start to create things, or come up with things, that would make your world look gloomier!
The other day, -I never and I mean NEVER had the black bags under my eyes'.. never knew what they meant, or how they looked.. never even bothered to buy a concealer to hide such things, and then someone told me you have black bags under your eyes! And now whenever I look in the mirror I keep checking under my eyes.. It just terribly annoys me.
So if there's nothing wrong going on, by hearing such words, many things start to look wrong or bad for you.
Recently, I've decided to be around people who reflect some positive energy and a positive attitude. Somestimes saying small words- that you think have little meaning- can make someone extremely bothered. Even if you say them to show you care, or to show your love... such things if said in a wrong time or a wrong way, they would have the very opposite meaning.
It's really important to chose the ones you want to spend your free time with,,, the ones you want to include in outings... lately, I felt that some people can make you feel down easily. No matter how good you feel, they turn to experts when it comes to ruining your mood!
Think before you say things, If each one gets to be treated in the same way he treats people.. Im sure there will be less trouble .. and definitely less headaches!
21 Comments:
At April 30, 2007 , Tareq said...
I wonder why people feel that way when someone "usually honestly trying to help" comes along to ask what is wrong...
5 years ago, i thought i would never tolerate that just as u do,, but after those 5 years..[to be exact last night] i realized that its a blessing if you are feeling down and someone comes to ask what's wrong,, r u ok?!
Many poeople have the ability to heal others and make it easier for them to pass over certain troubles in life (those are the supportive kind of people we all look for,, right??) but when a "Supportive man or woman" loses his/her own power to heal him/herself" wouldnt it be SO SAD to leave them alone and not care about how they feel or what they are facing and whats makin them BLUE????!
Sometimes,, SOMETIMES,, we need our time alone.. to stay away from others for a while,, but in MANY TIMES,, we just wish that a supportive soul be around to take care of us and send us back on track...
Thats my humble opinion about what i read,,, all in all, it was good! ur writings are quite worth reading so far,, keep the good work, Dima.
At April 30, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
Tareq.. :) It is a blessing, I totally agree! But when it's asked in the wrong time or in the wrong way, and it's asked a thousand times when there's ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong.. then It gets on the nerves .. no!? There were times when I had to make up things,, to come up with anything, so that I will no longer hear those questions! :S
Being a moody person doesn't help too.. ! If im to hear those questions each time my mood swings.. :S It would be a real problem!!! haha
Though as you said, I wouldn't imagine feeling down or sad, and being lonely! Guess you are right if you look at it from this particular angle ;)
At April 30, 2007 , Tamara said...
It definitely makes a difference being surrounded by positive people. some people just have the tendency to drain the life out of any thing and any one for that matter.
Just brush it off : )
At April 30, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
Tamara.. yeah!!!! to avoid and keep a distance ;)
At April 30, 2007 , Anonymous said...
that is so true .. and when u areexplaining smth to some don't say: this is diffi coz he would have this idea and never understand it ..
i went thrugh a similer setuation 2 days ago .. they kept on asking me what's wrong .. offfffffff i went to bed and slept like ababy 2d ma waja3ole rase ...:P
At April 30, 2007 , Anonymous said...
hey you have a butterfly flying in your blog? did you notice O_o
You know the people who can make you feel down no matter what? the experts in it? yeah I am one of them :D
by the way I am not kidding, there is a butterfly here!! yeah there is no point of my comment, just passing by..
At April 30, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
bara2.. Headaches! That's all I can say.
jasim.. yeah I know!!! guess why? maybe because Im the one who put it there ;)
At April 30, 2007 , PŕōuđPāŀĩ said...
i always believed that like attracts like, w positivity is contageous and so is negativity, if u keep urself with gloomy ppl u will eventually become gloomy, its like they r a bottle of grape juice and ur a bottle of pure water, the further u mix, u will eventually become red in some sort instead of pure see-through water.. thats how i c it anyway :D i might be blabbing :p
and yes yes yes!!! i cant stand ppl asking & nagging r u ok? something wrong? fi shi! inno khalaaaaas! if there is something wrong i wud deal with it on my own and if there isnt and im just quiet or calm then let me be :smily biwalwel:
At April 30, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
PŕōuđPāŀĩ.. no matter how good you feel, you would get affected, even if a little bit.
and sometimes you feel like telling them, if there's something to be said or shared then this would happen naturally! So just drop it.. and stop asking!
At April 30, 2007 , Life said...
well.. it all depends on who is asking.. and your emotional mood..
if its the time where you really need to be asked.. and its asked by someone you trust and welling to talk to .. its the best..
but someone you know is only asking to know somthing you are not welling and will not tell asking at a wrong time..
ohhh thats so annoying indeed...
At April 30, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
Life.. I dont' like to ask! I respect others' personal life.. this is why I don't understand when Im asked all those questions :S
And as you said it depends on the emotional mood, i have a different one every hour! Haha
At May 01, 2007 , Unknown said...
You know something, if the question was asked in the opposite way it would have been simpler! For example, if you were asked: are you ok? instead of what's wrong? it would be nice! In our conversations, we all have to point on the positive sides...like instead of: you look tired...we should say: it's going to get better soon...instead of saying: I hate or do you hate...just say: i don't like...u see what I mean...it really makes a big difference in the overall situation...And ALWAYS make sure you are surrounded by positive people who would make you feel good, no matter how moody you are:)
At May 01, 2007 , Sam said...
I know what you mean it is very annoying...it just like when i was wearing contacts after few hours my eyes would get red, and some people would ask why are your eyes red...then my eyes would start hurting me after they ask. one person had to ask everytime i saw her, and she was my neighbour so i saw her alot, that was super annoying..
btw i love that butterfly it is so cute!
At May 01, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
nido.. EXACTLY!!!!! I mean the way things are said sometimes helps in making all the difference! 3anjad Nido.. well said! ya3ni I can't agree more :) But I guess some people can't but insist on showing the negative side of everything :S
At May 01, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
Sam.. maybe it's something psychological :S Im not sure really, but it's seriously just like you said it! You start to feel things after someone mentions them to you.. and if it happens a lot, then this would be a real problem! :S -as you said!
At May 01, 2007 , Anonymous said...
Akh, this is so true. I have someone special in my life who dosn't ask me if I was upset or feeling bad, he just sticks to me and tries his best to be around to let me feel that I have someone by my side.. I love that alot :)
At May 02, 2007 , Unknown said...
I can understand this, I have been at both ends of this situation. When I am upset but I'm still trying to piece it all together, then someone comes along and asks and I just explode! And then there are the times when nothing is wrong at all and in fact inside I feel different to what is showing on the outside and someone comes along to ruin the day. Then there were the days when I ask someone what's wrong and I get a good telling off hehe
Even though I don't like it sometimes, I have been in the situation where I am really upset and I would give anything for someone I could talk to, or someone to show they care and found nothing and this went on for a long time. I know it's always been said but it is true in a way, we always take things for granted until it is too late.
If this person's intentions were true, then yes you still have the right to lash out but sometimes the intent is better than the act. Sure they could just be there for you and that's fine but it can be hard to tell if you want someone to talk to you about it or you just want their company.
At May 02, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
Side.. :$ now Im blushing! yeah you might be right, of course I wouldn't like it if i feel down and need to talk to someone but find no one around.
But I was talking about people who keep asking 'what's wrong?.. what's wrong?!', when there's nothing wrong.. but with each time they ask you this question you get to feel that there's something wrong .. just because there must be something wrong! :$
Im a Gemini, who needs to be left alone from time to time, so that she'll gain double the energy .. and come back stronger ;)
At May 02, 2007 , Unknown said...
LOL yeah that's true, I do hate it when people ask too much when there is nothing to tell. I guess you could eventually start wondering if it's you or them that's wrong!
They would think something is wrong because you are not acting like the person they normally see you as, they just need to learn that sometimes you need your space.
Everyone needs some alone-time, it can be therapeutic and also helps you appreciate the company you keep more.
At May 02, 2007 , Anonymous said...
I know exactly what you are talking about. I mean it really is annoying. I do not mean to hurt other people's feelings, but I try to avoid them if they make me feel down. Why? Simply because if it were me who is in a bad mood, I would not go around and spread it. So please, if you have something to say that might bother others, just skip it!
Of course it would be a whole different situation if me or one of my friends were down, then we listen to each other :)
By the way, the butterfly is cute ;)
At May 02, 2007 , and life goes on... said...
Hala.. this is why I believe If we get treated in the same way we treat people then we'd get less headache.. or no headache at all ;)
Im'adameh.. click on it and take it :)
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