the latest TREND
So many concepts have changed if we want to compare our time with our parents'. It all started with the words BF/GF! This didn't even exist earlier... Many of the students who are currently at schools, say
that nowadays a girl with no boyfriend would feel odd and out of place... it
wouldn't just feel right to stay single! Hitting the 18 and still single.. is considered unacceptable and pathetic.. !!!
What's considerably increasing though is the divorce rates! It's just insane.. in the past year I've heared about 5 different couples (whom I personally know) getting a divorce.. and it's so shocking! All of them had a married life that lasted not more than two years...
A word divorce used to have a very annoying harsh effect on our ears, and now it seems to be the latest trend! It's more like hearing about a girl breaking up with her BF. And the question is why?!!
A friend told me it's because we're so open now, and a girl or a guy would be having many previous relationships.. and comparing between the new love and old one is capable of destroying any strong relationship! He believes that to make it live it should be the first pure love.. but I don't see it this way, I believe a person can go through an old experience and this would only make him cherich and appreciate more what he currently have. To compare between people is not a wise thing to do, no one is perfect, and if one is good at one thing then he's bad in another .. to compare means to kill your present and destroy whatever future there might be.
Is it because of the extra freedom we have? That would make a married man look at another, or would make a well mannered lady seduce a married man and insist on
continuously chasing him?
Is it because we lack the real feeling of responsibility or the fact that we're used to being pampered? Or is it the lack of knowledge of what both- marriage and building a family truely mean..?! As it's definitely more than a wedding, and all the dance.. it's more than a honeymoon package, roses and romance.. more than affection and good times..
It's sharing..... a life!
Or it might be that the way we tend to deal and handle our problems nowadays is just different,,, it's a one- way thinking... which makes divorce the easiest, and quickest solution!
that nowadays a girl with no boyfriend would feel odd and out of place... itwouldn't just feel right to stay single! Hitting the 18 and still single.. is considered unacceptable and pathetic.. !!!
What's considerably increasing though is the divorce rates! It's just insane.. in the past year I've heared about 5 different couples (whom I personally know) getting a divorce.. and it's so shocking! All of them had a married life that lasted not more than two years...
A word divorce used to have a very annoying harsh effect on our ears, and now it seems to be the latest trend! It's more like hearing about a girl breaking up with her BF. And the question is why?!!
A friend told me it's because we're so open now, and a girl or a guy would be having many previous relationships.. and comparing between the new love and old one is capable of destroying any strong relationship! He believes that to make it live it should be the first pure love.. but I don't see it this way, I believe a person can go through an old experience and this would only make him cherich and appreciate more what he currently have. To compare between people is not a wise thing to do, no one is perfect, and if one is good at one thing then he's bad in another .. to compare means to kill your present and destroy whatever future there might be.
Is it because of the extra freedom we have? That would make a married man look at another, or would make a well mannered lady seduce a married man and insist on
continuously chasing him?Is it because we lack the real feeling of responsibility or the fact that we're used to being pampered? Or is it the lack of knowledge of what both- marriage and building a family truely mean..?! As it's definitely more than a wedding, and all the dance.. it's more than a honeymoon package, roses and romance.. more than affection and good times..
It's sharing..... a life!
Or it might be that the way we tend to deal and handle our problems nowadays is just different,,, it's a one- way thinking... which makes divorce the easiest, and quickest solution!
posted by and life goes on... @ 9:00:00 PM
10 Comments:
At May 12, 2007 ,
Sam said...
i totall agree with you, i do not beleive how widespread divorce is now..i was used to hearing about canadians getting divorces it was the norm..but a decade a go hearing of an arab divorce was like an OMG ...but now it is becoming a no big deal..of course divorce is an easy solution..just run away and do not deal with the issues...and since society is a bit more exepting of it now, it easier on the couple to choose that route.
At May 12, 2007 ,
and life goes on... said...
Sam.. 'A no big deal'! Exactly! it's like having a boyfriend and just breaking up.. And as you said, i also see it as a way of running away from things! Society is so accepting now.. Some parents should take the blame too! I've seen cases were they'd be behind it.. and would even welcome it with open arms :S
At May 12, 2007 ,
ma7joob said...
so true , i think it's because we’re emotionally immature , we want the hollywood kind of marrige , and another reason is that parents are not telling their children about the true meaning of marrige .
and the last reason i think it's because as time goes by we're becoming more cold and heartless .
At May 12, 2007 ,
Anonymous said...
Another reason would be that women nowadays are stronger, independant and not willing to tolerate disrespectful husbands (or an unhappy marriage in general whatever the reason is). they are willing to be divorced and labesled as such but not live a misrable life.
At May 12, 2007 ,
and life goes on... said...
Anonymous.. They're more independent I agree, and stronger too! No one should tolerate a disrespectful husband.. not now, not ever! Im talking about the fact that divorce nowadays is the first solution for most couples..
At May 13, 2007 ,
and life goes on... said...
ma7joob.. cold and heartless! I don't think so :$ Being emotional is not the reason behind a long lasting marraige! but I agree with the enmotional maturity.. :)
At May 13, 2007 ,
Mais said...
I agree with you, I don’t think it’s because of the comparison with a previous relationship and all this. As long as they didn’t end up together then there’s nothing deserves comparing in the first place! plus as you said, a previous bad experience should make one appreciate and cherish what he/she got now!
I think it’s because of the lack of responsibility. Many couples fail to take marriage seriously and they don’t truly understand the real meaning of marriage, so they just collapse and fail at the first real problem they face!
One more reason I think is this attitude some girls got, thinking that iza ejet 3ala 7alha shwai then she’s belittling herself, so betseer el masa2el bas takbeer rass and kelmet meen bidha temshi bil a’7eer. Of course no one is saying eno el wa7ed tenhan karamto ow yeskout, there are limits for sure, put some just don’t understand that and they make a big deal out of everything forgetting that they’re dealing with a new person and not their moms or dads, and they are both coming from different backgrounds and environments, so they need time to understand each other’s habits and all this..
and if were's just talking static’s wise, we all know that being married or still married doesn’t mean that the marriage is a successful one, many couples and specially women stay in a marriage for many different reasons; like having no one to support them financially, the fear of the word divorced and all the restrictions the woman will live under, the society that tags divorced women and so on…which all used to be a very important and major issue in the past...and of course it's not the case these days...so the number of divorces in increased!
At May 14, 2007 ,
and life goes on... said...
Oriental Arabesque ... this is exactly what happens- they collapse at the first problem they face, not knowing that problems (as long as they're not related to MAJOR, or BIG issues) happen to everyone and anyone .. any time.
Also, not knowing that they're sharing a LIFE.. and that compromising might happen at one point or another. And if it happens then it's normal.
But I insist on the fact that the society is more accepting now, to the whole idea .. and this is one of the reasons why we're witnessing more divorces these days!
At May 16, 2007 ,
Anonymous said...
I agree with you. I blame the parents though as they should be more responsible and careful when it comes to their own kids.
I do not believe that ANY PERSON is fit or actually able to have a healthy relationship before the age of 18. One would be growing up and maturing and getting to discover life; the last thing one needs at such a sensitive age is more confusion.
As for the divorce rates, well that is what happens when people do not take marriage as seriously as it should be taken.
At May 16, 2007 ,
and life goes on... said...
Hala.. when you're still studying, the image you have for the 'ONE' has nothing to do with your standards when you're done with univeristy and more mature.. when one knows exactly where he stands and what he wants in life.
And I disagree with people who say marriage is harder for men.. as for women too it's almost as hard! it's a new life, shared responsibilites.. and a MAJOR change.
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